COUPLES THERAPY
Here is what my clients say....
"Therapy with Bec has given me better perspective and understanding of myself and the people in my life, which I have found way more helpful than traditional psychology methods.
The few sessions I have had have honestly been more helpful than any other style of therapy I have ever tried."
"Bec has provided clarity around the root causes that have contributed to our tension and challenges. The tools and strategies have allowed us to think and discuss things differently and we can start to make some conscious changes.
As we continue therapy, we become better engaged, connected and are much happier and more positive about our future".
What to expect at the first session
The first session is daunting yet exciting. Its a time to meet and familiarise yourselves with the therapist as well as the process of therapy.
Its also an ideal time to ask questions about what therapy involves and how Imago therapy differs from other types of approaches. This is your time to decide if this approach and this therapist will be a good fit for you!
The first session is usually a great indication of the 'vibes' you get from your therapist (their personality, style and space being offered) so you can assess your preferences and suitability.
In fact, the first few sessions are generally geared around creating comfort and safety for everyone to be open and able to explore without judgement.
Its important to think about what you are hoping to use therapy for. Its helpful to be able to express what you want from your therapist so that all best efforts can be made to focus on that from session to session.
Couples Therapy is NOT:
Blaming, judging or faulting any one person
Arguing in a room with a stranger
Psycho-analysing, lying on couches, making people cry
Couples Therapy is:
Talking with your partner in a physically and emotionally safe space
Disagreeing without arguing and shouting
Understanding the disagreement and using it to inform future action and seeing it as opportunity for deeper connection
Discovering what unconscious beliefs and ideas you have around romantic relationships, your partner and the roles you play that if unexpressed cause havoc in your home
Identifying where you might be compromising or disowning your own needs and desires and feeding resentment and old trauma cycles
Learning how to align with your personal needs and taking responsibility to satisfy them as well as giving your partner opportunity to do the same via requests not demands or expectations.
Learning that true love is empathy and conscious compatibility and that you cannot have either of these things without 'doing the work'
Imago TherapyImago therapists approach therapy with a belief that:
- All couples naturally approach a stage of conflict after the romantic stage wears off.....This conflict is actually an opportunity to explore what past experiences and pain we have not processed are impacting dynamics within the current relationship. We can use this pain to motivate growth; or avoid it and find coping mechanisms.
- We live in a culture where emotional maturation is rare. Many of us have not emotionally matured and operate primarily unconsciously. Without the tools or experiences to regulate and chose a response to stimulus around us, most couples wind up in highly emotionally-charged, self-protective war zones. This is symptomatic of a lack of experience within a culture to teach the skills required; not any dysfunction or 'problem' with the individuals.
- Your partner is attracted to you (and you to your partner) because you were just the right blend of what they want more of and what hurts you the most. This puts them in the best place to support both their own growth and yours in a multidimensional healing process, all within the framework of an existing relationship.